Midget sex pt 2 tonight
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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