speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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