You really coming over, don't trick.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
