it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Randomize
