she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
