Quick, to the slutcave!
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
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