? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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