Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
