dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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