carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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