would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
