he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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