Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
