I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
