I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
