Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
