margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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