My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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