That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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