Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
