wanna go halves on a baby?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Randomize
