So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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