uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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