we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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