We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
