we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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