White coat. Heels.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
