actually, I'm a sock model
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
is wine microwaveable?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
