He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
