May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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