i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
