i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
