What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
