The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
