I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Randomize
