Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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