whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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