You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
