dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
