He kissed a someone with a penis
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Randomize
