He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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