Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
It's never too late to be topless.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
