This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
