rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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