i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Shame - the story of my life.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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