I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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