First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
