So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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