I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
He uses pillows to masturbate.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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