Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
